“God, my heart hurts right now!”
It hurts bad! Not from a broken relationship, not from a death of a loved one or friend, and not from some loss or even a great sorrow.
Instead, my heart hurts, pure and simply, from the misunderstandings and judgments of people.
While my intentions were good and noble, they were totally misunderstood by other people, who stand on the sidelines of my life, just watching me. While my words and deeds were carefully thought about, prayed over and gently delivered, they were judged incorrectly by self-appointed critics around me. While I completely knew and understood the set of circumstances that I was living out, others entered those circumstances only to find fault and criticize the pure intentions of my heart. Can anyone else relate to that kind of scenario?
There are no words to describe that kind of “heart hurt!” It just hurts! And it hurts bad!
The Psalmist knew that kind of “heart hurt.” Please, read and hear his heart in these words:
“I am troubled, I am bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long…I am feeble, and severely broken; I groan because of the turmoil of my heart.” Psalms 38: 6 and 8 (NKJV)
When you are the recipient of someone else’s misunderstanding, judgment, faultfinding and criticism, it does something awful to your heart. It is hard to recover from. It tears your heart into pieces. It destroys intentions. It discourages. It weakens confidence. Especially when what you intended to do or to say was planned and meant to help, to encourage, to embolden others. When others come behind those efforts with their self-appointed criticism, intense fault-finding and “better than you” attitude, it relentlessly crushes your spirit. Your heart is broken!
Why do people think its okay to do that to another human being?
One thing I have learned from the Psalmist is that I can come before my God and simply lay my hurting heart down to Him. Whatever my heart holds at that time, I can give it to God. And my God, graciously, accepts that heart, with an abundant measure of LOVE! I do not fully understand God’s love. I just know that God loves my heart! He cherishes it!
The Psalmist says, “Lord, all my desire is before You; and my sighing is not hidden from You. My heart pants, my strength fails me; as for the light of my eyes, it also has gone from me.” Psalm 38:9-10.
I may not always be able to talk with another human being about how badly my heart hurts at the hand of the self-appointed critics in life, but I can always talk to my God! He is right there for me. He saw and heard what transpired. He clearly knows the intentions of my heart. He saw and heard the reaction of others. He has seen and heard my reaction to them. God knows what happened. He cares!
And yet, as a child of God, He wants to hear from me. He awaits me coming into His presence with the desire to talk with Him. He longingly waits to hear what my heart will say to Him. As I lay before Him my hurting heart, I instantly feel His compassion. I am wrapped in His comfort. I can rest in His care. I can trust my heart to Him.
“For in You, O Lord, I hope; You will hear, O Lord my God…Do not forsake me, O Lord; O my God, be not far from me! Make haste to help me, O Lord, my salvation!” Psalms 38:21-22.
No matter what people do (or say!) around me, when my heart is hurting, I want the Lord my God! I want to talk to Him. He alone will truly understand my heart. He looks upon my intentions and decides whether they are good. He picks up the pieces of my crushed heart and begins to bring healing. His love heals. His love knows and understands my heart.
My heart is in good hands! Today and always!!